breathing,

Tears and Prayers

7:41:00 PM Unknown 4 Comments

A typical weekend was planned this weekend some family time combined with couple time. A little grocery shopping, a little relaxing that was the plan. But plans don’t always work out and my weekend was a little bit of stress mixed with crisis and topped with snow. Here’s the story...the weekend started with a colossal snow storm on Friday that prevented the grocery shopping and our biweekly visit to the Wok Box. Then on Saturday Big Sis woke up sick she felt warm and as luck would have it my thermometer broke so I couldn’t tell her exact temperature. Also, her breathing was also laboured and she laid on the couch all day watching movies, and if you know this two year old this is highly unlike her. So a snow day and a sick day, not to bad but this day took a turn for the worse and drove straight into tears, prayers and sleepless nights. It started with Big Sis wanted to see Bumpa so we drove over there and had a little visit I noticed her breathing had got worse it was more laboured and slightly wheezy but I thought she had croup so I thought I would keep an eye on her, and then as we were driving home I heard a gasp and look in the back seat and Big Sis was completely blue, gasping for breath and trying to claw her way out of her car seat it a panic. I quickly unbuckled her and pulled her into my arms her skin felt like it was burning my lips. I rushed her into a steamy bathroom and gave her Advil and thankfully she did improve a little but I still brought her to the ER. As we were driving to the hospital Big Sis’s Hyper ventilating and wheezing were a strange comfort, but when she became quite that is when I started to get uneasy and I would feel her pulse and recite CPR techniques in my head cursing myself that I didn’t pay more attention in class, then I would pray to God and I told him determinedly “you are not taking her today”! We made it to the hospital which was a blessing because the road were white out conditions and the Doctor gave her medicine and diagnose her with Bronicolitis and sent us home. That night she would wake up gasping and crying asking me to help and I would lie holding her counting her breaths and then the sun came up, the wind died down and I hoped the storm was over. And it appeared I was right on Sunday morning she was feeling better, still wheezing but in general she had improved, but then in the afternoon her temperature soared and her lips and fingers were blue and through laboured, wheezing breath she said “mommy help” so I took my lethargic baby back to the hospital and again I said to God “Not today either!” In the end the Doctor gave her antibiotics and more puffers and today she seems better, I do believe the worse is over. She has been bossy and she ate a little and she has been playing... sweet relief. It is amazing at how you can love someone so much and your world freezes when they need you, without thought you rush to their side and nothing matters but their comfort.